A pain in the neck.....

The surgery is over and done with! Yea! It's such a relief to be home and still alive and to have that nasty tumor OUT of my neck! The last few days have been pretty crazy. To recap....

The night before my big day, my parents took Joey and I out to dinner. All the kids were farmed out to different family members so I could have a few days after the surgery to recover and rest in peace. ( Thank you guys!!!!) We went to eat at Sweet Tomatoes and it tasted so good to me! I knew I wouldn't be eating for awhile so I savored every bite! When Joey and I got home from dinner, my friends Shelly and Lisa came over with an "anti-boredom" package to help make the recovery time easier. It had magazines, a book, candy, a blanket, ect... They're the greatest! Thank you ladies!

The night before surgery, I layed awake most of the night feeling sick to my stomach. I couldn't take any sleeping meds so I just lay there listening to Joey sleeping like a baby...not a care in the world! :) The morning couldn't come soon enough! I just wanted to get it over with. We had to be at Tempe St. Lukes by 8AM to check in. They told me I could shower and put on deodorant but NO makeup or lotion or anything like that. It's bad enough you have to have surgery but then you have to feel all disgusting, too! I was really tempted to put a little lotion on but ultimately I followed the rules. Joey took a picture of me in all my glory right before walking out the door....(it's hard for me to post all the following pictures but this is my journal and I want to document it. Sorry if it's disturbing to anyone!) Once we got to the hospital, my stomach calmed down a little. They took me back to pre-op and got me hooked up to an IV and made sure I knew that really really bad things could happen during surgery. They went down the list...bleeding, infection, permanent loss of voice or permanent hoarseness, collapsed lung, heart attack, death...ect. Then I had to sign "consent" that said I still wanted to go through with it. I actually DIDN'T want to go through with it but I knew I had to.
They gave me a cute hat to wear and Joey snapped one last picture before they wheeled me back to the surgery room. Cute, eh?

I don't remember much else after that. I remember getting put on the table and the anesthesiologist saying "goodnight" and then waking up 4 hours later. I woke up with a horrible headache and really really hot because I had blankets piled up on me. I could hear my recovery room nurses talking about who should take their lunch break first and I was desperately trying to open my eyes or move so they would know I was awake. It's a strange feeling to be completely paralyzed like that. It seemed like forever that I was trying to tell them I was hot and to take the blankets off me. Eventually I gave up and just went back to sleep. I woke up in my hospital room. That first day is all kind of a blur. I remember having a horrible headache all day and intense pain when I tried to swallow. I had no voice. When I would try to talk it was just a scratchy whisper. It hurt to try to talk so I just didn't talk unless absolutely necessary. At one point the nurse came in and asked me if I wanted to go for a walk in the hallway. I was like..you gotta be kidding me lady! That's the LAST thing in the world I want to do. Then she mentioned that she didn't want me getting blod clots and I remembered WHY it was important to walk after surgery. I say no thank you to blood clots. That's all I need! So I got up and walked. Joey and my mom were good about documenting all my achievements. It FELT like an achievement! Who knew that just walking a few steps down the hall could be so difficult? I know now that this whole thing will make me a better nurse. I will understand now why it's so hard to get up out of bed after surgery. How all you want to do is lay there and NOT move! I think I will be more patient and understanding where as before I had no idea what surgery is like and how much it wipes you out. The second day I woke up feeling much better. I was still in a lot of pain but I felt my brain was less hazy. I think all the drugs had finally worn off and I could think more clearly. I was able to get up and brush my teeth and wash my face. I ate a couple of bites of scrambled eggs and passed on the cream of wheat. No thanks. I tried it but I couldn't get it down. It hurt to eat so I just didn't!
Right after breakfast, Dr. Mendelson came in to take out my drain and talk to me about the surgery. He said the tumor was bigger than they expected or anticipated. He had to make my incision bigger than he had originally told me it would be because he needed to be able to get it all out. He said due to the fact that it was so large, it will take a week to be tested for cancer. Next Wednesday I get the results of the tests back and I will know if it was cancerous or not. If it is... I have to have more surgery. If not...I'm DONE! I can go on with my life! He told me I need to use my voice and not baby it. I guess the nerve to my voice box was in the way and it had to be moved and he was a little concerned it might have been damaged a little. He told Joey there was a possiblity that I would have permanent hoarseness. As much as it hurt, I forced myself to use my voice and not whisper. Yesterday, my voice came back completely and I was so relieved! Occasionally it will go out but for the most part my voice is back. Today is three days post-op and I feel pretty good. My neck hurts like the dickens..especially when I try to turn my head, but I can swallow without too much pain and I can talk! So I'm good!

Thank you to everyone who cares about me and my family. Thanks for coming and sitting in the waiting room and being bored! Thanks for the cards, the calls, the cinnamon rolls, the flowers, the emails, the dinners....everything! Thank you for taking my kids away and doing fun things with them so I could rest and recover in a quiet house! I can't thank you all enough! I will let everyone know what I find out on Wednesday! Hopefully it's good news!

Check out that BAD BOY scar!!